


mind is a razor blade

by starfleetbanana



Category: All For the Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Canon-Typical Violence, Homophobia, Knives, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-29
Updated: 2016-08-29
Packaged: 2018-08-11 19:41:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7905130
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starfleetbanana/pseuds/starfleetbanana
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For Andrew nothing seemed a problem unless it actively threatened Kevin’s or Neil’s safety, or it pissed him off enough to feel like reaching for his knives. Apparently Jack had a particular talent for that sort of thing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	mind is a razor blade

The new Foxes’ line up was a threat for Neil’s mental health. Most of the new recruits kept to themselves since the older Foxes seemed to have their own closed circle –with tinier circles within constantly shifting-. They still had to spend time together according to Dan, even outside the court because _teamwork is important even if you do it like Andrew._ Wymack agreed, and even if Neil hated every second he had to spend with Sheena and John/Jake/Jack/whatever, he had to learn to separate his opinions from his work as vice-captain. It didn’t make it less of a pain in the ass.

The only thing Andrew would do to help him was sit on the floor with a bottle of vodka and stay silent for hours just to get on the Upperclassmen’s nerves. Though Neil was sure it was bad for their behavior on the court, it still managed to get him distracted.

The recruits were mostly sure they’d never get to understand their teammates, or at least they wouldn’t have enough time to do it since three of them were graduating soon-ish, and the rest only wanted to murder them most of the time.

Neil understood they had problems and somehow they believed that gave them the right to be assholes, but in the Foxhole Court things didn’t work that way. In the Court you weren’t allowed to lie unless it was vital for the game and the team and most importantly you weren’t supposed to pick a fight with somebody holding an Exy racquet. Jack was bad at listening, though.

For Andrew nothing seemed a problem unless it actively threatened Kevin’s or Neil’s safety, or it pissed him off enough to feel like reaching for his knives. Apparently Jack had a particular talent for that sort of thing. He tried to stay away from the Foxes since no one could stand his stupid face, much less his words. Andrew’s stare made him feel uneasy.

He seemed particularly fond of judging every one of Neil’s decisions related to Exy, but he kept himself silent when he wasn’t with Sheena because he knew no one would support him. According to Kevin he only had an attitude problem that needed to be corrected with more Exy practice –they wouldn’t work because although he was good, Andrew wouldn’t assist to the practices- and a bit of a scare.

Andrew couldn’t waste his time on someone like him, though. He was convinced the only thing Jack wanted was attention and he’d never give him that unless he was spending his precious time hurting him. He was used to ignoring him like everybody else did, but the remarks he kept making on Neil’s vice-captaincy certainly deserved more than Dan’s sighs and Kevin’s yelling.

Neil considered things were as good as they could get with the Foxes. Practices were okay, games weren’t –as expected-, and movie nights happened so often he was starting to question his use of “the Upperclassmen” and “Andrew’s lot” since Aaron and Nicky’d started hanging out with Dan, and Matt could at least talk to Andrew without being completely dismissed. Things were okay, until they were not.

It was Friday night and they were in Matt’s room. Neil was supposed to be doing homework, and Andrew had to study for a test on Ethics. He still couldn’t believe how he’d even been accepted in the program, but he guessed it was alright since his own experience gave him another important point of view.

Neil could say he was used to physical pain all he wanted, but that didn’t stop him from hurting when things got a little bit too rough for his liking. Andrew’s grip on his knee would leave a bruise.

Jack opened his mouth again, this time to comment on the way he’d finally realized how the Foxes were supposed to work together. If Aaron’d been there he would’ve thrown a bottle at him to shut the fuck up for all the wrong reasons, Neil thought.

“That’s how you did it last year, right?” He asked with a cocky smile. Everyone wondered why he even bothered using his words with them. “You keep your monster using your joke of a vice captain as a whore. I knew you were fucked up but I never thought you’d be faggots, too” He continued. Neil blinked at him incredulously. He’d probably thought since Andrew was resting his head on Neil’s shoulders he was too bored to react. “And the both of you have those matching things on your arms as if no one knew what _Nathaniel_ and Andrew did to themselves” He finished as he snorted, repositioning himself on the sofa.

There was a whole minute of silence, the dialogues of the movie simple white noise for every single one of them. Matt kept his hands on his thighs, ready to grab hold of Andrew to keep him from skinning Jack alive even if he got stabbed in the way. None of them could do anything.

In a matter of seconds Andrew was on top of Jack, pushing him down with his weight and keeping his head down with one of his knives pressing against his neck. “Did Nathaniel get fucked by his daddy, too?” He muttered under Andrew’s body. That was the moment someone started shouting and Neil stayed there unable to move. If Jack kept talking he’d end up dead.

“Oh, that’s what the armbands are for” A new fox whispered behind Neil. He could see Jack’s blood on one of Andrew’s knife. He knew Andrew could easily reach for a second knife and stab him unexpectedly so he stopped himself from moving before Andrew’s quick movements got someone else hurt too.

“Jack, can you shut the fuck up for Exy’s sake?” Kevin asked yelling, throwing his arms up in the air.

“Or maybe that was you” He said nodding his head at Andrew “That what made you be so fucking disgusting?” Andrew’s knife pressed deeper, only drawing blood though. His expression changed and he reached for his second knife, a moment later the knife was deep in Jack’s right thigh and everything was chaos.

After half an hour of Dan trying to calm the new Foxes down and someone trying to get the other knife from Andrew, Wymack was lecturing Andrew on why it was not okay to hurt teammates, while Kevin shouted at him because it’d mess Jack’s game. Andrew only shrugged without feeling the need to give any sort of explanation. He’d had enough.

Everybody knew words didn’t exactly get to Andrew unless he was feeling more vulnerable than usual which happened only when he was trying desperately to protect Neil. Neil was safe, or so he thought even with all the bruises on his back and legs with all the Exy racquets he’d received during the week before. He’d done to it as a way to scare him, he now had to know his boundaries.

The sofa was blood stained and that gave him a sense of victory. Andrew knew he could keep pushing if the kid continued antagonizing them just to get enough attention, he’d bury him alive if that was what would keep everybody sane in the court.

“Kevin will kill you on your sleep” Neil said next to him as they walked back to their own room. Matt had no idea what to say and he kept apologizing before everyone left. Neil’d made sure Jack would be alright. He’d laughed at the knife still there, knowing if he opened his mouth Andrew could twist it and make his muscles useless for Exy. He wanted to punish Jack though, not Neil or Kevin.

Andrew nodded unsurprised. He knew exactly what Kevin would do. After all the shouting the self-deprecating part of him came and no one could stand to spend more than five minutes next to him because, if he was usually obsessed with Exy, in those moments all he did was practice nonstop until his muscles screamed for him to rest. The Ravens had told him not to stop until his knees buckled, Riko’d taught him hurting didn’t mean you couldn’t keep going. He was as stupid as Jack was.

Andrew reached for his jean pocket where he kept his armbands. Wymack insisted on respecting his privacy but still having to check if he’d manage to kill him someday. He’d shrugged at the size and shape of the knife, knowing it must’ve hurt like a bitch, but nodding his permission for Andrew to get out.

“Keep it” He said, offering his knife to Neil. Abby would get there soon, which meant Andrew would get his knife back only if he was lucky. He knew it meant much more than protection.

He wanted to ask, he wanted to look into his soul wondering why the hell he felt so happy right after Andrew’d stabbed somebody. The knife was still blood stained and when Andrew noticed he cleaned it with the fabric of his armband before reaching for Neil’s arm. He tucked it carefully in his left armband. It was warm, and the weight of it was so new to Neil he felt himself flinch.

Having his own knife meant a lot to him. He’d always thought he’d have Andrew to do the dirty work but with the time he’d accepted he was okay making Jack bleed to death if it was necessary. He hadn’t been able to protect himself from anybody in Baltimore, he couldn’t fight hard enough with his fists, and Andrew’s blinding rage was in that knife too.

“Won’t you miss it?” He asked, the knife sliding against his against his skin as they walked. He knew having a new piece of Andrew had a hidden promise. If Andrew wanted a new knife for him he could’ve gotten it just like he got the armbands and the key, but he didn’t want to give him something to mirror his feelings, he wanted to give him a part of him without saying it out loud.

“What makes you think I only have two?” Andrew answered. Neil knew he wasn’t lying but he also knew those specific knives bore much more than bad memories. He smiled and kept walking toward the room.

He knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep with all that panic and excitement unraveling inside his body and Andrew’s weight next to him wouldn’t help. He’d twist and turn until Andrew was kissing him tired, using the same strength he’d used to hurt Jack to hold him down, pinned to the mattress. He wouldn’t complain, though.

**Author's Note:**

> So instead of coming to my uni library to borrow a laptop to study for an important exam I didn't study for because I was too busy writing Andreil, I burrowed a laptop to write yet more Andreil.  
> Honestly I've been fantasising for this moment to happen for a while and though I know this isn't the best thing ever written I just needed to get it out of my system. Honestly expect a bunch of Andreil from me from now on because I can't stop myself. Also for some reason every song by The Knife is suddenly an Andreil song so the title's from one of their songs too.  
> Something else I'd like to add: Can we talk about Andrew giving one of his knives to Neil, though? (find me at bcshirs on tumblr, I'm good at yelling about characters I love)  
> Kudos and comments are appreciated, thanks for your support everybody!


End file.
